articles

Special Kids, Special Needs ~ A Sibling's Perspective

April is Autism Awareness Month

By Ashley & Sophia, for our brother Marky April 10, 2013


Written by Ashley, Marky's 17-year-old sister

Autism: A developmental disorder that appears in the first three years of life, and affects the brain's normal development of social and communication skills.

As I sit here reading the definition of what autism is on the website of public medical health, I find it difficult for anyone to understand the true meaning of what autism is unless you have had experience firsthand. 

My sister and I, along with the rest of our family, experience this on a day-to-day basis being that our 8-year-old brother, Mark, is only one of an estimated 1.5 million percent of people who are affected by autism. Because of Marky’s autism, it sometimes gets difficult to understand what it is he may need, or why he may do the things he does.

For example, when dinner is ready, Marky doesn’t always come when called, not because he is being rude, but only because he doesn’t process that when dinner is ready we all come to the table. 

It is so easy to get frustrated with Marky when he doesn’t do things the way others would like him to do them, but what people don’t know is how incredibly affectionate and emotional Marky really is. He sees the good in everyone, anyone he meets he loves unconditionally, and there is never any judgement or prejudice. Those who have Autism are almost all the time the most kind people you could ever come into contact with.

No matter what, Marky can always make anybody smile. Now and then I will think to myself about Marky’s future and as happy as he may be, I sometimes get very scared and saddened by the things that run through my head: How will he know when to cross the street? How will he defend himself in high school? Will he ever drive? What if he is laughed at for things he may do in class that students don't understand? Are his friends going to understand him?

Yes, I do realize that these thoughts and questions are all unanswerable, but there is one thing that is for certain: we can all contribute to the comfort and happiness of those with autism by being more aware and considerate to the people that surround us. 

Next time while you are waiting in line and the child or teenager in front of you is making a certain noise you don't like or doing things that may not make sense to you, instead of immediately getting frustrated and angry it is important to take a step back and look in from the outside. Think about it for a second rather than wasting energy on getting frustrated or prejudging. Think about the possibilities that whomever it may be that is bothersome is someone who has challenges and obstacles that are difficult to overcome, but ultimately in the end, even more hard to control.

Autism is nothing minuscule today; it is more and more common. The more of a solid understanding and grasp that we are able to have, the more we can all work together in achieving the goal of autism awareness. I give all the readers a challenge this week. The challenge is to “Keep it in perspective.” I would like for everyone to do that at least once this week, the minute you find yourself placing judgement or getting frustrated by others, just keep it in perspective and think about it from a different angle, like Marky! 

That's what I try to do. My brother teaches me every day and these are lessons that no one will get in school! For that I thank him.


Written by Sophia, Marky's 10-year-old sister

Having an autistic sibling can be, well, hard. Especially when they are acting loud and doing things differently than the rest. 

I have an autistic brother, Marky. He is 8 years old and can be a little wild. I love him anyway. We love to play together. Usually we play hide and seek or tickle tag. He loves to laugh and have fun. He may not always be able to tell you what he wants but we can usually figure it out. 

My friends like to play with Marky too and I am happy that they have fun with him. Sometimes he can do things that embarrass me and it can be hard. I know that he does not know any better. Marky always makes us laugh. He may be autistic on the inside but on the outside you couldn't even tell. He is a great brother.