Date Night: New Parents' Edition

Get back in the dating groove

By Lindsey Rickard January 31, 2018

Whether it’s been ten days (remember when Chrissy Teigen set the internet on fire?) or six months since your baby’s arrival, there will come a time where you’re ready to get out of the mom uniform and spend some QT with your OG #1 love.

But, speed bump: date night usually ends up at the top of the “things that feel different” list after baby arrives. Our solution? Work through what's holding you back, and plan a tryst you'll both look forward to.

Get a handle on the sitter situation. When it comes to the dinner-bath-bedtime routine, mama (and papa) can’t just hand over the reins to just anybody, right? When family isn’t an option, personal references are the next best thing for finding the perfect sitter.

Ask around your social circle, your Facebook groups — wherever you find reliable intel. Once you’ve connected with a potential match, hire the sitter to come one evening before your date night and go over everything together in real time for a test run.

Get ready. We mean really get ready. Get the sitter to the house 45 minutes before you’re leaving and use that time to get yourself feeling, well, like yourself. Put on some music, heat up that curling iron (err, maybe dust if off?), and pull out the high heels you've been dying to wear again.

Start small. Ease into the transition with dinner and drinks at your favorite joint around the corner. Aim to leave after baby is asleep for the night (or better yet, involve the sitter in the bedtime routine in the hopes she’ll be able to tackle it solo eventually) and return before the typical first wake-up if feeding is stressing you out. Whatever you need to be comfortable with getting your foot out the door, do it.

… and be sure you’re on the same page with your partner. Whether you’re planning on checking in every half hour, once after bedtime, or putting your partner entirely in charge of babysitter check-ins, be sure your partner knows where your head is. Not everyone can take off the mom hat as soon as she leaves the door, and if you need help finding your groove, speak up. If the groove is there and you are ready to toss that mom hat like it’s your high school graduation, all we can say is ... get it girl.

Set some ground rules. It’s always hard to put the phone down while away from baby, but ditch the texting, scrolling, and social media check-ins. Do your best to keep the baby talk a minimum, too. And one last thing: there’s no mood killer like a last- minute pharmacy run for diapers on the way home. Leave the errands for the morning.

Try a Day Date. We’ve found sitters love booking day date coverage. (That whole putting the baby to bed thing? They’ll happily avoid it, too) What to do when the sun is still out? We’re huge fans of doing something active — moving around can remove that “we must connect over meaningful conversation right now” pressure that can rear its head during dinner and drinks.

Our faves? Indoor rock climbing, snow shoeing, hiking, or running a 5K. Not looking to break a sweat? Wait the two hours to get into that art exhibit you’ve both been dying to see. Book a sushi-making lesson or a butchery class. Head to your favorite bar to watch your alma mater’s basketball game. Go for a couples massage or shopping together. Volunteer. Booking a sitter is allowed for any of those situations.

Keep it up. Take turns planning dates, and keep it as much of a regular thing as you can. Try something quirky (open mic comedy night, anyone?) or cross something off the bucket list to create new memories and meaningful ways to connect.

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